Shilpa Devi Das
Shilpa Devi Das, who lives in Nagwa in Ward 16 of Birgunj Metropolitan City in Parsa, became a daughter-in-law when she was 17, and a mother when she was barely 18 years old. She was still of the age to play and study when she was burdened with the responsibility of looking after the family and raising a child. A bitter dispute erupted on the very day of her wedding regarding dowry, because of
which she was subjected to demeaning treatment at her in-laws home from the very first day. The two months spent with her in-laws after the wedding felt longer than two years for her because even within that short span of time her in-laws were already inquiring whether she had become pregnant or not.
Although her family is to receive 3 katthas of land after the division of property, the land has not been transferred in her
She believes that the discrimination inherent in the domestic division of work is an aspect of sexuality. Her brothers were educated in an English medium school while she was sent to a government school and also made to do household chores. She now realizes that her belief, which is also widely held in her society, that sexual minority persons are born as a result of the sins of their parents is wrong, and that humans of every kind are equal and therefore must be treated with dignity.
Shilpa Devi Das, who lives in Nagwa in Ward 16 of Birgunj Metropolitan City in Parsa, became a daughter-in-law when she was 17, and a mother when she was barely 18 years old. She was still of the age to play and study when she was burdened with the responsibility of looking after the family and raising a child. A bitter dispute erupted on the very day of her wedding regarding dowry, because of
which she was subjected to demeaning treatment at her in-laws home from the very first day. The two months spent with her in-laws after the wedding felt longer than two years for her because even within that short span of time her in-laws were already inquiring whether she had become pregnant or not.
Although her family is to receive 3 katthas of land after the division of property, the land has not been transferred in her father-in-law’s name yet. Only the house in which the family lives, which occupies 5 dhurs, is in her father-in-law’s name. In her family of six people, her father-in-law sells vegetables. Since her father-in-law stopped selling vegetables owing to his advancing age, it has become additionally difficult to run the household. Shilpa and her mother-in-law are worried about how to pay household expenses because of their poor economic condition. Shilpa thinks that her neighbours look down upon her family because most of her neighbours are civil servants. Since her husband doesn’t have an income, the neighbours gossip and the family itself needles them. Since she has given birth to two daughters within two years of marriage, she has had to listen to barbs and insults about not giving birth to a son. She says that she has been filled with the courage to do something and to live since she became engaged with Apan Katha Apanei Bunechhi. She feels that the attitude of her mother-in-law and her neighbours has changed since they began observing her work and her knowledge. Since she grew up in a Dalit-majority society, she did not know much about discrimination. She remembered only a couple of incidents, like having to wait for on-Dalits to finish drinking from a tap before being allowed to drink even though she was parched with thirst. But she had taken that to be an age-old tradition. As she studied, she began understanding that caste was created to rule over others, and that there is no such thing as higher or lower castes.
She believes that the discrimination inherent in the domestic division of work is an aspect of sexuality. Her brothers were educated in an English medium school while she was sent to a government school and also made to do household chores. She now realizes that her belief, which is also widely held in her society, that sexual minority persons are born as a result of the sins of their parents is wrong, and that humans of every kind are equal and therefore must be treated with dignity.
Shilpa says that she has learned to build stories without speaking, to write her own stories, to question the narratives others tell, and to write poems and songs that express the sorrows, pains, joy and emotions experienced and seen by her. She claims that she has become capable of taking decisions about herself. She says that from the study of caste, sexuality and gender she has been developing the skills to deeply understand and write about the Madheshi Dalit woman.
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